I found myself in competition with a friend this week and it was hard. I had so many emotions running through my mind:
Excitement for the opportunity.
Guilt for competing against her.
Jealousy over her talents.
Worry about the affect it would have on our relationship.
It was tough. Have you ever been there?
It's easy to become jealous over a friend's success, especially when we're in the middle of a rough patch. Somehow it feels like our friends should always be beside us, experiencing the same things, so we have someone to commiserate with. Unfortunately, life isn't like that, but in a way I'm grateful. I want to have something to celebrate when I'm going through rough times, and what better way to take my eyes away from my problems than to celebrate something good happening to a friend.
Here are some ways we can stop being jealous and start being happy for our friends' successes:
1. Be Their Biggest Fan
We can decide to be a cheerleader for our friends. When we lift up your friends, we become invested in their successes. How can we feel jealous when we've been there coaching, helping, and encouraging them? We need to remember that we're proud of our friends and they deserve good things happening to them.
2. Make a Pact
We can make a pact with our friends that anytime one of us wins, we get something special. All of us. That way when one of us is rewarded, we all get rewarded. Sounds fun, doesn't it?
3. Remember Our Time Will Come
The next time we feel like we're always losing and our friend is always winning, we can sit down and make a list of all the things we’ve accomplished. Then we can tell ourselves that this is our friend's time to shine, but our time will be coming around again. We've been successful before and we will be successful again. And when we are, our friends will be right there celebrating with us.
Excitement for the opportunity.
Guilt for competing against her.
Jealousy over her talents.
Worry about the affect it would have on our relationship.
It was tough. Have you ever been there?
It's easy to become jealous over a friend's success, especially when we're in the middle of a rough patch. Somehow it feels like our friends should always be beside us, experiencing the same things, so we have someone to commiserate with. Unfortunately, life isn't like that, but in a way I'm grateful. I want to have something to celebrate when I'm going through rough times, and what better way to take my eyes away from my problems than to celebrate something good happening to a friend.
Here are some ways we can stop being jealous and start being happy for our friends' successes:
1. Be Their Biggest Fan
We can decide to be a cheerleader for our friends. When we lift up your friends, we become invested in their successes. How can we feel jealous when we've been there coaching, helping, and encouraging them? We need to remember that we're proud of our friends and they deserve good things happening to them.
2. Make a Pact
We can make a pact with our friends that anytime one of us wins, we get something special. All of us. That way when one of us is rewarded, we all get rewarded. Sounds fun, doesn't it?
3. Remember Our Time Will Come
The next time we feel like we're always losing and our friend is always winning, we can sit down and make a list of all the things we’ve accomplished. Then we can tell ourselves that this is our friend's time to shine, but our time will be coming around again. We've been successful before and we will be successful again. And when we are, our friends will be right there celebrating with us.
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