​At 16 I attempted to take my own life. I would make another attempt at 19. And I am SO THANKFUL that I FAILED in those attempts. Why? Please... PLEASE read why.

I was removed from my family's house when I was about halfway through high school. My grandparents took me under their roof and provided for me something I never thought was possible in a place of acceptance. But both of those things would never have happened if I didn't reach out and ask for help from my friends and family that weren't living with me. They helped me learn what resources were available for me, who I could talk to about these things, and what could be done, and although it was only little steps... THEY WERE STEPS and steps in the RIGHT DIRECTION! I began to understand that I had value, that I was important, and that I did matter to people around me. My confidence slowly rebuilt and I started to rediscover who I was and what things made me truly happy in life. 

Like I mentioned before though, I did attempt to take my own life again at 19. And at this point in my life (at 25) looking back, I hope I can provide some perspective for you - knowing where I was then. Once I began to understand what made me happy I began to make longer, lasting friendships and relationships with people around me, but I relied too much on those people. In high school and especially through college and working in the 'adult' world, these friendships don't last as long as you see in movies and TV shows. So when they ended, it really hurt... it dug deep. After having surgery that took me from my dreams of playing any sport in college, breaking up with a long-term girlfriend, and learning my last term of high school dropped my GPA below scholarship levels I thought I was losing all my value as a person again.

At this point something wonderful happened and I would hope and pray that it can and will happen in each of your lives if you are reading this now:

Is it possible to bully someone without saying a word?   I find myself wondering that today, and I keep landing on the same answer:  yes. In fact, I think it's one of the cruelest forms of abuse I've seen, as it cuts at the core of every human's need to be acknowledged, accepted, and loved.

Over the Christmas holiday,  I watched an entire family ignore one of their family members.  This young man sat on the couch for most of the day, quietly watching the other family members hug and talk to one another.  He sat there for hours without any interaction.  In the past, this family has justified their treatment of this relative by saying no one likes him.  He's weird.  He's different.  He doesn't fit in with the family. He's always been strange. They end their conversation with the phrase, "It's so sad."  I guess that's the one thing on which we all agree.  It is so sad.  It's so sad seeing someone who has been through a lot of trauma get treated cruelly by his family.

I've tried giving them the benefit of the doubt. I've tried telling myself that maybe they've forgotten that holidays bring back memories of dead relatives, and they didn't realize he was feeling sad and wishing he could celebrate with his father one more time.  Or perhaps they didn't take time to consider he was looking forward to seeing his family and having a warm, happy experience.

But should those things really matter? Doesn't every human being deserve to be spoken to politely and shown warmth over the holidays from their family members?  Especially from family members who complain loudly about the intolerance of the future President Trump?  

I'm not sure this family's definition of tolerance matches my own. However, there is one thing I'm sure about. Tolerance begins at home, and it starts with being kind to family members, even those who think and act differently than the rest of their family.  Kindness trumps hate everywhere, even at home.

Love the story of this courageous, young man who stopped the kids at his school from bullying him with one simple, kind act. You don't have to let the bullies bring you down. Instead, you can fight back by using one of the hardest weapons to resist....kindness.