This powerful video was shared to my Facebook page. Its images triggered some painful emotions, but the message is clear. People who have been through the battle of depression and survived know that hope is waiting on the other side. Whether you find it in faith or somewhere else, hope is waiting for you. Please don't kill yourself!
When my sister was critically injured in a high speed car accident, I didn't think things could get any worse. I held her hand in the ICU on our first Father's Day without our dad, and I thanked God for saving her life. I wasn't prepared for old family wounds to resurface and inflict their pain...but resurface they did.
I won't go into detail, but I will tell you what I've learned from watching my family and others. Families tend to orbit around one another. Sometimes they take turns orbiting around each member. Sometimes they just orbit around one family member.
Families that orbit around one family member tend to orbit around their "favored" member or their "problem" member. In each instance, they can be so focused on the one who's pulled them in, they are unaware of what's happening with the others outside of their immediate concern.
If you feel as if you are standing outside of your family's circle, my heart goes out to you. Please realize you are just as worthy of their attention and love as the family member they are focused on, but they may not be able to show it to you. Let go of that expectation. The gravitational pull of the situation may be too strong to expect a break in family patterns. Family attention and approval does not make you more worthy. You are worthy from being the person God created you to be.
Be that person. Forgive your family for their humanness and set boundaries if you need to do so. Then go live. Love on others the best way you can and forgive yourself if you get pulled into an orbit of your own. Life is too fragile and short to hold grudges against others and ourselves. Go do. Go be. Go live.
Many people, after the deaths of Anthony Bourdain and Kate Spade, are asking each other how such successful people could commit suicide. What could they possibly have been depressed about? Even Anthony Bourdain's mother is questioning his decision. “He had everything. Success beyond his wildest dreams. Money beyond his wildest dreams..."
You might think that success, wealth, and adoring fans could protect you from pain, but they can't. Pain is sneaky, and it will always find a way into someone's life, even if that someone is highly talented and successful.
That's where the problem lies. Pain hides in the shadows, so when we catch glimpses of other people's lives, we often can't see it. We see only what's thrust into the light, and we believe our lives should be just as happy. Then when they aren't, we get worried and discouraged.
Anthony and Kate must have been feeling very discouraged to do what they did. It's too bad they never realized the number of people who would have reached out to help them. Maybe then they wouldn't have chosen the wrong solution for their pain.
Suicide wasn't the solution for their pain. It never is.
Depression likes to lie and tell you that there is no way you can overcome the pain you are feeling in the moment. But it is wrong. Do you know how you can overcome the pain? Look at this picture.
I don't know if you've watched the movie "13 Reasons Why," but here is a scene that shows why suicide is not the answer...13 reasons why...13 people coming together and helping each other get through the moment.
There will always be people who will come alongside and help you through the pain. Always.
All you have to do is let someone know you are struggling. Then you need to believe what they tell you.
You are loved and needed.
You are not a burden.
You will get through this pain.
Pain is not a death sentence. It's a warning that it's time to reach out.
Suicide Prevention Lifeline (24 Hours) tel:1-800-273-8255
- Get Help Now